EGO

Before writing this Post....i was in dilemma whether this is the right topic for my next post...There are always two ways in which u can approach a subject,thing,person,decision what ever..one is with ur heart and one is with your brains...Some times brain n heart will think and act similarly..but some times there will be a conflict between them on a same topic...In this case also my heart and brain had a conflict.Heart was saying don't go for the topic but my brains was constantly stimulating or sending impulses to my hand to write on this topic...So at last i decided to be with my brains...

 EGO-> Exaggerated Glorification of Oneself
(Courtesy Antony George Pattara)

This is the expansion which one of my friend has given for EGO...
I am not sure whether EGO is an abbreviation or a word itself..
But once i saw the expansion of Word Ego i felt like its 101% correct...

When you browse on this topic in Internet...you can find different explanations given by different people in different ways...

Medical Dictionary says -> Ego means : the self especially as contrasted with another self or the world

Cultural Dictionary says -> The “I” or self of any person

I was believing that EGO is born with us...But after having a small study on this topic...There are three parts of the psychic apparatus

1) ID
2) EGO
3) Super EGO

In that ID compromises the basic pleasures or can say it acts according to pleasure principle and it is unorganised.

But EGO is one step higher to ID.It is organized as well as  it acts according to reality principle

Super EGO aim for perfection ,its is the one which controls our sense of Right,Wrong & Guilt.

These are the technical things which i understood about EGO.

I don't know whether its good manner to think on a topic too much..But i am person who thinks too much..sometimes it will be some productive thinking sometimes it's bootless or can be very clearly say "Waste of Time"...During my thinking process i will always have a self analysis...Normally these self analysis process happens each and every day.During that time i can clearly say what are things which i done correct on that day or what are the things which would have been avoided.But all through this process i was clearly knowing one thing that i am becoming more "Egoistic"...

After doing something wrong and doing an argument to make ur part safe n clarified doesn't need much courage...(Any idiot can do that)That's when we just see and evaluate things with emotions and heart...But doing something wrong and to accept what u did is wrong need some courage.To accept that fact we should not have EGO....That's when we evaluate things with our brains...I know everyone who read this know this fact.But the point is that how many of us have that courage or open mindedness...to accept something which we did is wrong or is a mistake...I can say very few.....(Don't know how many agree to that)...

But there is one Strong reason for me why i wrote this blog on the later part i will come to that...But when i found my Egos is at it's Hike i just felt to get out of that... I never like to be one with Unnecessary Ego's....

Every man has his own Egos' and it varies from person..some issues which one feel silly might be the Ego of other...So there is no point in saying that others have EGO...Because that is something like Keeping Match stick in ur eye and saying other is having dust in his Eyes....So better way is once u realise that you are Egoistic which is lil more than that of a normal level try to find a way out of it...

EGO is very powerful so that it can make u do anything..
I personally feel that you become more Egoistic when u feel that you are not Inferior to any other around u...but it neither can be called as Superiority feeling.For me its some thing like a feeling of Equality...But then you will be thinking how equality can be a Ego.Because in our concept "Equality is a nice n wonderful concept" But when the situation change this Equality can more or less like an "EGO"

Just for an example only i am saying...not at all from my personal experience

A Women one who always believes in Equality got married to a person who always consider girls are always inferior to guys in that case "Equality is an EGO of that Women" which that husband can never agree with.
(Lucky my husband is one who gives me my space to live and give me my freedom to express)

I was person who never likes to hurt any one's feeling..But now i cannot say with my whole heart that i am not hurting anyone..Sometimes knowingly or unknowingly i might be hurting someone or the other..it might be my Husband ,Parents, Friends,Cousin, Colleagues..

But mistakes which we do unknowingly won't keep us more Egoistic because we will be ready to say "Sorry" on that ,but the mistakes which we do knowingly will make us more n more Egoistic..Because a simple word "Sorry" will make us feel miserable.We will have the feeling that we are defeated...But once we are out of the Ego and think that Simple "Sorry will keep us so much higher"

I already told i am person who doesn't like to hurt others feeling.I am person who's turn off is "Teasing" now all of u will be thinking "How Silly" I accept the fact that its silly but unfortunately my turn off is teasing..For me teasing is the thing which makes me more egoistic.

I told u there is a reason y i wrote this blog..Some days some comments in FB made me soo disturbed....At that point of time i was seeing that comment with more of an Ego..and some times will comment back in a way which make my EGO satisfied and may hurt the other person..I had prolonged fights on some unnecessary issues.But now i understand i should have been more logical & spotty...and now i really  want to see things in much a spotty spirit.

Here i will quote one simple eg...

"I never want He/She to be hurt"

With accepting  the fact that i should not have commented like this...
I am quoting a Comment Session on one of My Album..
But at that time i commented with EGO...I am saying sorry for that too!!! I know he/she might have commented in a very very spotty way and was just fun..n i am the one who took it seriously...

X Says : edi cut cheythu thinnoode....orumaathiri pattikuttikale pole...che che

Me Says :I am happy does I look like Tuttu;)
Not in comment for ur info (Tuttu is a doggy)

X  Says : aiyyada...avanu ithilum dignity ondu 

Me Says : i don't know... with what u measure Dignity ?????????????any way i have self respect n mutual respect ..in that sense i am dignified :)

The word Dignity and comparison with a doggy made me "Egoistic"

I don't know whether my comment has hurt her/him..But my Ego spoiled my whole day..From that point i decided i should find a way out of these kind of Worthless EGO's which won't help me in any way and won't take me any where.....

I know someone will be rushing to find who is that "X"
But don't rush i already deleted the comment n publish this post hehehehhe :)

"I am saying a 10000 times sorry if i hurt X in a word or a deed"
Because i clearly know its my mistake..More over X is one among my best friends i always love n admire...


Last but not the least a word to one who njoy and act as the catalyst to unwanted arguments n pulling others leg on Public Platform Just ".... Off"

 EGO is miserable not only to u but for others also....So once u realise it get Rid of It.... Accept mistake always be open for corrections....I think my post will make at least one person to think...If not also i don't bother...Because i am on the way out of my EGO....Yippee!!!!!!!

Now n Then

Today Nov 1st 2010…..


Two years back this was the day before my wedding A day of anxiety, excitement, happiness, lil bit of pain, agony….. Yes these are all the feeling that a Bride should have gone through on a day before her wedding… 2 years have flown and just want to do a Rewinding as well as Fast Forward…to feel how I felt on Nov 1st 2008 n Now Nov 1st 2010…


Even with out a 2nd thought I can figure out the difference…


Nov 1st 2008
Woke up by 7:30 am Nobody annoyed or disturbed my sleep (Since i was a Bride)

Nov 1st 2010
Woke up by 6:30 am
Today My "Alarm" annoyed me n disturbed my sleep
(Since i am a Wife)

Nov 1st 2008
Woke up with Great Happiness n Exciement

Nov 1st 2010
Was almost as Normal as all other days...

Nov 1st 2008
When i woke up No one was with me on My Bed...

Nov 1st 2010
When i woke up saw my Husband sleeping beside me

Nov 1st 2008
Was thinking about the Day of wedding..
what all should I do so that I will look beautiful on my Wedding day...

Nov 1st 2010
Was thinking what too cook for today..so that my husband should not have to take his lunch from a Hotel :)

Nov 1st 2008
Rushed to the kitchen to hear the discussion happening between my mother,aunts n catering people about the Menu of food that should be cooked 4 lunch and how it should be served...

Nov 1st 2010
Rushed to the kitchen to cook food so that i can make to the office at correct time.
("Secretly" with out getting scold from husband for my Last Minute Rush)

Nov 1st 2008
Had a Nice Break Fast...(With all the food which will be there in a Kerala Break Fast)

Nov 1st 2010
Had Strawberrry Roll...that too in a rush on my way to office
(Which is not enough for a Break Fast)

Nov 1st 2008
When i didn't dressed properly..Aunts were there to ask me to change dress n wear a new dress...n dress up well...

Nov 1st 2010
Don't even get time to Dress up n do makeups even by looking a mirror :(
No one to bother whether i dressed properly
(Husband is not that concered about the dress i wear...)

Nov 1st 2008Was srrounded by Relatives n Friends...

Nov 1st 2010
Nobody Surrounds me rather than my Colleagues...(Issues which is registered by Different Departments in my Company)

Nov 1st 2008
Not even got a Single Minute to Sit if front of My PC.

Nov 1st 2010
Completly hung with my Office PC..Since my Nature of Work is Like that :(

Nov 1st 2008
Amma n Aunts were behind me asking to take my lunch at the correct time...

Nov 1st 2010My collegues (Vipin , Syed,Mr Mani) buzzed me when it was 1:30pm which is our fixed time for lunch...

Nov 1st 2008
Had great Kerala Sadya with Payasam....

Nov 1st 2010
Today also Lunch was not that bad..(Payasam was replaced by Sweet Corn Soup)

Nov 1st 2008
By eve 3:00 pm was getting ready because it was time for the Evening Party...

Nov 1st 2010
Writing my blog by recollecting what all happened on Nov 1st 2008.

Nov 1st 2008
My Cousins were all excited n happy because its their time to njoy the Eve...

Nov 1st 2010
Today not even a single Cousin or Relatives is with me...
(Chatting with them online) Some even complaining that I don't ping them when they appears online...)

Nov 1st 2008
Every thing was well planned and well set so that there was no confusion on what all should be done on Nov 2nd my wedding day..
(Wedding Dress, Jewellery,Last Trial Make Up,Dress which has to be taken with me to Husband's house...

Nov 1st 2010
I don't even have an Idea to which Hotel we should go for Tomorrow's Dinner
Who all should be invited to join us.
What dress should I wear n he should wear...
What kind of a Cake I should Order...
(Totally in a Word I can say "Unplanned/Unorganized")

Nov 1st 2008
Received so many phone calls from friend's and relatives for wishing me a
"Happy Married Life".

Nov 1st 2010

Not even recieved a Single personal Call..All call's received were Official that too either to Report Issues or else to know what is the status of their Issue which is already reported.
(The people who made the call were Wishing that their issue should have been solved in Near Future :) )Wishing was Common Factor in 2008 n 2010 only Context Meaning N Person changed

Nov 1st 2008
All responsibilities for the day was taken Care by Achan ,Amma ,Aunt's ,Uncle's ,Cousins ,Brother
& GrandMother

Nov 1st 2010
All Responsiblilites has to be Shared Between Me N My Better Half....

Nov 1st 2008Was the VIP of the day....

Nov 1st 2010Now the Organizer / Host of the day.

Nov 1st 2008 /Nov 1st 2010

Waiting for the "Best Day of My Life"

My License Story

This time when I am writing my blog I am really excited n happy…That’s simply becos I got my United Arab Emirate Driving Licence/License (US /UK) spelling :)

If the there is strong will in you u can achieve that…Becos for me this is the best example. I still remember the days which went for the classes to get my Indian Driving license…After completing my Degree only I applied for my Indian driving licence...That’s simply becos my achan’s pressure. Every one my family including my amma are good drivers…The only exception from that group of drivers is me myself :(I was not that interested in to that field..Becos my mode of transportation was always Bus/My Activa/ will sit at the Back seat of the car very leisurely enjoying my own business. My dad is a person who keeps on telling me something which he likes me to do/achieve. Like all Dad’s he is also the one who is very proud in her daughter’s achievement. So my driving license also falls in to that category. There itself I was not that happy with my driving learning becos I always felt it’s not something which is suitable for my caliber. But I just love to see my amma driving. I really feel jealous on her when she drives so easily  n always proud to say that my amma drives...Shez always the best:)My style Icon 

By 2005 April I got my Indian license. The funniest part is that I only drove my car hardly 2 times that too 5 to 10 mins... Suddenly after that I got my MCA admission was shifted to hostel. So once or twice in a month only will be going home…but I was having my Pavam Activa I never felt like Car is necessity for me...n more over nobody helped me to sit beside to give me hands on experience on driving:)Just after MCA got married n landed here:)


Once I came here n started going to office. I started feeling like I should have a Driving License…becos my transportation was always a big question on the days which my better half is busy with his on jobs… If he come late to pick me , even if because of his works. I always make Big Time Fights just becos I was hang up at @office… for an Hour…So even me n my husband felt like for a happy married life Driving License is also important. Otherwise we cannot predict the evenings which we make fight becos of this late Hour pick up :)

Here its not that easy as you take a license in India...There is 101 documents and procedures…Any way I decided to Open A File for getting my License. Initially I translated my Indian License to Arabic that around cost 70 AED …After that I went to the Abu Dhabi Traffic Department and Opened a License File. Before opening a File we should be certified from the Dr that our vision is Good enough so that we can see the Cars/Vehicles/Pedestrians/Two wheelers in front while driving…So for that testing itself it cost 20 AED that’s reasonable…For opening file it cost around 100 AED n I was given a Temporary Card for Learners:)



Then I went to emirates Driving school where I spend around 1000 Dh for my Theory classes and Theory test.



I was given the option to select the time slot for classes. so selected the 6:20 8:45 slot so that can reach by office by 9..



So that time was ok because 2 hr class …after the class will go the EDC canteen and will have some sandwich. that was the best part I liked during my classes..4 days classes were over. Then came my test…Test was ok so passed in first chance itself:)





After the classes my husband took the initiative so that got a Patani Trainer…His name is Jameel…The only thing I suffered n sacrificed during my classes is my sleep. Because morning 7 AM to 9 AM is my classes. So for cooking n stuffs have to get up by 5:30 AM which never seen even during my Examinations  On the first 2 days I was so happy to go for the classes…On the first day itself he taken me to some Highway n was asked to drive at 120KM/Hr if some one thinking i am bluffing absolutely not :). My god I was shocked n was shivering he never allow to touch break. On highways..Bu gods grace I reached safely. On the first day he didn’t teach me any rules. So I was driving as per my rule. Second day he taught me the rules. From the third day started getting nice shots from Jameel..Initially I just hated Round Abouts and the rules to be followed. It was too tough for me…After some days I was friendly n ok with Round Abouts…Again came that shocking part U Turns..Jameel always have formulas on road.How to take Uturn when Kerbstone is small wehen kerbstone is large..For taking Round About, for changing lanes. My body n my hand never worked together. But I put 100% concentration on my classes. The only main aim for me is to pass the test at First chance…Not because of just prove I am good at driving becos daily I have to spend 130 AED (130 *12.50INR) for the classes..On Fridays which was the only holiday for me I wake up 5:45 am n gone for the classes…On each n every day I will be thinking not to make mistakes not to get scolding from Jameel..But for first 10 minutes everything goes well becos I will be concentrating at my fullest. Then starts Jameel what Ma’am y are u doing this? what are u doing???????????what u did is not a mistake its blunderrrrrrrrrr which he gives stress on the word blunder....My God some days I will be so nervous after his first scolding itself n will loose my confidence n will do a lumsum of mistakes. Each day I have to give review to my husband…but I never told him that I am driving properly with full confidence…always tell him about what all scolding I got from Jameel .On each day during my driving one thing i remember when i am going to do mistake is My husband's advice "Dont Driver with emotions Drive with Brains"....But one thing I noticed that after 4 days of my class jameel wont be listening to my driving full time he will be busy with his Time scheduling, talking over phone. he will scold me once I do sudden breaking then only he will understand I have gone wrong some where. Daily I used to drive around 100 + km with in this 2 hrs. I have almost seen all parts of Abu Dhabi. But I always thank Jameel because hez the one who gave me confidence. He will be giving me lectures on Patan’s ability in driving n where Malabari’s fails in driving. At last that D day came October 4th.On that day too Jameel came n pick me from home by 5:45am...from 5:45 to 7:45 I gone for classes n my test was scheduled by 7:45 am… On that day of my class I made blunders…Jameel was asking what happened ma’am u fought with your husband today… But Jameel was about to leave after dropping me at the Driving School he told me Madam u are a confident driver..Dont worry Insha Allah u will pass..I still remember 1 week before we Dropped a Russian lady whoz also Jameels student for her test.But when she was getting out of Car he was explaining her how to Book for her Next test n he even told me that he so sure that She will Fail.But Jameel said bye to me in such a way that we won't be meeting again...But on that day I really understood whatz “Butterflies in stomach”. My adrenal gland was working too much on that day….Anxiety kept on increasing. So many thought flashed through my mind…Just brushed all the experience which were shared by people who gone for test. I know many people who did their 8th test n still managed to fail. Know people who were very expert at driving even with other GCC licence got at their 3rd chance. So I was really scared. Already I spend 3000 AED for my road classes if I fail I have to start from the scratch again spend around 2500 + AED…Again morning wake ups alarm cooking office classes..Ohh noooooooooooooooo,

By 8am from all of us an amount of 40 AED was collected n we all were asked to enter a Mini Bus. We were around 30 including Arabs Jordanian’s Indians Philippinos,Sudanis…Our Bus driver a Patan he was such a nice man…He was asking all of us to be cool. Then one Girl from our bus was selected by the police lady to driver first. So anxiety increased. We all were peeping through the window to see what’s happening. All most all were standing to see the Girl driving she drove for 5 minutes n was asked to park the Car…So at last breaking the anxiety the news came she passed. Every one was clapping n congratulating her…So from next candidate any one can volunteer 2nd girl passed 3rd girl passed n every one giving review that today’s police man was good only that was the only relief every one had. But from 5th candidate starts the failing in test. Every one who dint get their chance still back to the anxiety n tension..After that it was mix m match some failures some success….Some Indian ladies who failed in the test literally eaten their husband’s ear through phone explaining what all she did during the test ….Because that was her 3rd failure it seems…and I was 2nd last…I almost collected all the tips from the succeeded n failed one’s…With all these tips in mind I walked to the car…But don’t know by that time I think my adrenal gland was tired so was lil relaxed. No butterflies nothing. I walked to the car The SMB (Seat Mirror Belt) then GIH ( Gear Indicator Hand Break) This is the rhyme which I was continuously hearing from Jameel for past 23 days while starting car. Here actions n rules have more importance than the Driving skills. Check centre mirror In 3 seconds… entire tips n rules passed trough my mind. I recollected the feeling of a student whoz entering the Examination Hall. I was asked to drive straight and take a round about left...I took the round about very nicely. Once taken the round about left I have to keep the Right lane. As a monster, one Truck came in that right track. But with the full confidence which Jameel gave me I pressed the accelerator and when that truck was fully visible in my centre mirror I came to Right lane Police man asked me to park the car. In excitement I asked whether I have passed. I was asked to come to the back side of car where one Police Women is sitting...In the Driving Slip I can see police man putting his sign not marking any wrongs which I have done. So I was sure I was passed. Ohh my god that moment. I was shivering. I came to the Bus every one congragulated me. I called my hubby’s…He was also under full pressure. He was soo happy to hear that I have passed. I told him I will go to office in a Taxi. But he came to see me. The next one which i called is Jameel..i was so excited even don't know how to thank him...He was also happy for me..n he even thanked me for the call i made:)He always tell students won't call him once they pass the test..Then again I paid 370 AED for getting my Emirates ID which is now compulsory for getting license n then again 200 AED@ EDC n got my Driving Licence...



My parents were sooo happy to hear I got license…One of the wonderful moments in my Life….I came back office...Oops every one was shocked. My manager was very happy for me  He congragulated me …That day was like a day of excitement for me. I was not able to control my emotions…even I tried to work…but I can’t ….I am getting deviated…I think even My Boss neglected that :)

Next weekend itself I drove to Dubai…My first Long Drive :)

Last But no the least I Want to Thank Sarin Annan (My cousin) which I can proudly say as my mentor…His is the First person who told me to take License Hez the one who encouraged me, shown me the right path…always corrected me when I gone wrong…who always motivated me, who appreciated me when I achieve…A real role model of mine 

But one thing i understood from my real time experience is "There no Substitue in the World for Hard Work n Dedication ":)

Even if i spend 5000 AED for getting license it was Justified by my acheivement of getting the License in the First Go itself :)

Harrrrrrrrppyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Holiday

The day which EID was declared I was not having any idea how to spend those two days holidays. When ever I start a write up I always start with a negative note. I don’t know what to write…but really on that day I had no idea what to do for those precious two days holiday. Once is a blue moon only I will get a holiday like that…

On the Thursday I left from office by sharp 3 itself. I was overwhelming with joy becos 2 days holidays…The day one morning 8 itself I started with my Biriyani. Last day evening itself I went to a shopping mall n purchased all the stuffs required for biriyani...That was an internet biriyani.So I downloaded the recipe and took a print of it…




Coming to the biriyani.....Yeah I downloaded the recipe of Thalacheri mutton biriyani....
The day before the Eid a friend of mine gave me a link about star signs. I am a Taurean…the good thing in my star sign was that Taurean’s are very good at cooking. With that positive note and the self confidence. or may be over confidence , I started my cooking…I made some amendment n changed mutton biriyani recipe to chicken biriyani…yeah from starting itself the gravy n all came out well...n aroma of spices were good too. At the end of the Biriyani story there is one mixing of the rice n gravy should happen. The first layering was good…in btwn my husband was appreciating my ability in cooking. I was in cloud 9 and did the second layer...Oops..The gravy was lil more n the whole rice in the top layer was drenched in gravy…so I was totally helpless I just mixed the whole rice n gravy…as an excuse I named it Hyderabadi Biriyani…That’s how my Thalacheri mutton biriyani turned out to Hyderabadi Chicken biriyani…By gods grace the biriyani taste good only…


So had Biriyani very nicely a lil Biriyani was transferred to my neighbor aunty…Even she also did biriyani I got Mutton Biriyani as parcel…After that slept for a while n went out for a small shopping…then got a call from my frnd…shez coming home tmrw… the person who is gonna come is one among my best frnds..My room mate classmate study mate even we are from same place to… I was so happy n excited. Was thinking what to give her once she comes home. I was scared like after having my food whether she will come again… The one n only person who consume my food is my hubby…He always have the same comment.”Superrrrrrrrrrrrrr” may be becos of my torture only he says the same comment again again n again...Y I said torture becos even if for one day if he says some ingredient is more in my recipe …I will argue n make him say that…this is also good...That’s how he save himself.. Yeah coming back to my story...So dropped the idea of cooking when she comes home…But planned to make some snacks n all…




Day 2 woke up by 5:30 itself…for some cleaning stuff n all…becos of my excitement I was not able to sleep…Ystday itself planned to make so Medu Vedas(UZHUNNU VADA)…Even I gave a hands on experience to my husband to make him understand how to fry Medu Vadas...(For rest of the snacks i should again say thanks to Yousuf Ali) My frnd bichi n family came by 12 afternoon...Bichi is always very caring…Some weeks back I remember I told her like I just like idiyappam…When she came she prepared n get me a parcel of idiyappam…The only one thing I didn’t like is like she didn’t bring any curry for that lol…She left the choice of curry to me…After a small chit chat n gossip session we went out to an Indian restaurant. We all badly felt to have Sadya because for past few days my frnd was fed up with the Non vegetarian food .But we reached the Restaurant too late that we didn’t get meals. So again back to biriyani.But me ordered a Butter Naan with some chicken recipe…At the end a” Maggie I will Pay the bill” game was there.. Hopefully those who watched that srinivasan movie will understand the comedy. There was a tug of war btwn my husband my friend’s husband for the Bill Payment... At last it was paid by ikka… (My Frnds Hubby)not even a glance I didn’t see that bill. (You will be thinking. clever couple right) but we never want them to pay the bill…

From there we all went to the Grand Mosque of Abudhabi...I was here in Abu Dhabi for 1 n half yrs not even once I visited that place. But it was worth visiting it. We all marched to the mosque. At the corridor the security blocked me n my frnd and we both were asked to wear a Abaya (Parda)…There it self we will be provided with parda…I was soo happy to wear it becos it was my great time wish to wear a Abaya..My frnd is a Muslim so she helped me to wear the scarf in the Traditional Muslim style…At first sight…my hubs was literally shocked to see me in an Abaya...I was walking through like the best dress which suits for me is an Abaya….Then me started with photo session. Every one in my gang was fed up taking my pics…I was taking n deleting the pics which I felt like I look dark…hehhehehe.At last among 30 pics clicken!!!only two or three I liked :), from there itself it was hosted to my FB….I was like ohhh I did it….





It was around 6 even we all were back home had a tea n my bichoo said tata bye bye to me with her usual style of hugging…But the best thing is like…this holiday was not at all like my rest holidays…On a normal holiday. I used to be too lazy that hardly like to go out unless n until I will be offered some nice food or some other things which are very tempting to me…




Next day is Sunday …yeah have to be back to the Hectic schedules…Work Office Classes…

Waiting for another holiday…..

I am Alive

After a long time. I am in to the biosphere again….in between I was out of the world…
Lost interest in everything….Now I am back to the normal...n felt like ok will start with a new write up….I was in search of a new topic's badly i was not able to find a topic which was interesting. So thought like I should leave the idea of searching a topic's the better way is write something which makes my blog alive...

The moment when I started writing this I had no idea what am I gonna write…It's always motivation which keeps me moving…if not I am almost like a log which lost its motion…

I am now awaiting for EID HOLIDAYS …so hope I will have something to write after my holidays….Now the holy month is over…Have to be back to work with the normal schedules…Oops that's the only part which make me feel sad n sad…Still now was rushing to go home by 3:30…Any way I am gonna think abt the holidays n thinking n thinking how to make it more fruitful….

N 4 Non Residential Indians

N 4 Non Residential Indians

I am not a voracious reader or a writer. When I was thinking of a new topic for my blog the first topic which struck me was the incident I witnessed during one of my journey to my homeland as well as some other things which I observed as being a Non Residential. I feel this topic will have the same effect even if it’s read two years later. I am sure someone or the other will think, “What is new about this topic?” Yes, I do agree it’s nothing new; but I don’t know how many of you have jotted this down…these situations that are so familiar to you.

Even though I am not a voracious reader or a writer, I am a voracious thinker. On the way to my office, I always have some topic or the other about which I think a lot, right down to the minutest details. The topics may range from household stuff to films and songs’ from incidents at office to those that are not relevant to me at all.

And it was on a day when I was too early to work that I thought about and wrote this. My husband always asks me what I’m I thinking when he feels I’m lost somewhere. So I always tell him not to ask what am I thinking because its something even I can’t explain because I am someone whose thought wanders like anything… And within a short time, I can travel from UAE to my homeland, then to a shopping mall, then to some dream destination, then to my kitchen, my kid, then to my old hostel or college memories, then to my office… I can be an inconsistent wanderer :)

I landed in this country almost 3 year ago; to be accurate, 1 year and 4 months ago. Within this span of life here, I feel I have experienced and learned many things. I feel this is a land which God has created for expatriates. Yes, absolutely a land of “Dreams”. When you are in a crowd—no matter whether it’s a street, a shopping mall, a beach—you can see that everyone in that crowd is longing for something or rushing for something. We can see it in their eyes, their ambitions, wishes. I don’t know how much a man who’s staying in his home country can feel this. But I’m sure those who are staying away from their homeland will agree with me. 

When I was here in this country for the first time, I felt everything was new. People, the culture, and the lifestyle... for some days, even the language in which my husband communicated with me was unfamiliar to me, even though he communicated in our mother tongue!

Yes, for all the expatriates, their life in this country starts with the unfamiliarity to these things, people and situations around. The compromises we make or are compelled to make here is immense. Those who look at the NRI life will feel “Ohh! They’re so lucky…making loads of money and living a great life.” Yes, to a certain extent, and for a certain class of people, it is right. But for the majority of the people residing here, it’s not like that. The pain we undergo here is tremendous.

 During one of my trips to my homeland, a small incident I witnessed at the airport touched me. I was coming out of the arrival area, and saw a group of people who were eagerly waiting for their loved ones. Since it was raining, we waited at the airport for a sometime. In between, I was watching the people around. My attention was taken away by small group of 10 to 15 members. From the way they were behaving and communicating, it was clear they all were from the same family. The whole group was waiting for a single person. Finally, one man emerged: a middle aged, dark, thin man. Not at all the charming NRI. From his appearance, it was very clear that he didn’t have a fancy job. His wife was also in the group that was waiting. I became a little emotional seeing the reception they gave him. He was surrounded by the whole family. In between all the joy-making, I could hear his wife telling him to be careful about the puddles the rain had made, and not to slip and fall. The care and the pride she must have been feeling…

But I was also definite that she had no clue about the life or work culture of her husband in that faraway land. It is hard to believe—but some areas where the people reside here are more pathetic than those of Indian slums. But when one reaches one’s home country, none of that worry is expressed. Everyone will only see the many gilts, the glory of being an NRI.

Here, the day starts very early: almost from 5:30am itself, people start rushing to office. We works 6 days a week… 50 to 60 hours a week for 1 year or 2. Then, a vacation for 1 or 2 months. Sometimes, it’s very painful to see people working in the sun as the temperature soars above 50 degrees. It’s difficult to travel in a car with its AC at its max. So, imagine the pain and sacrifice these people are facing to keep their family safe and happy.

This is not only for the people who work in the sun; those with “white collar” jobs are no better off. They start their day very early too. Some have to travel hundreds of kilometers to reach their office. Mothers have to leave their months-old babies in day cares, with breast milk in bottles. Husbands will have a day off when their wife works, and vice versa. Husbands have day shift, wives have night shift. Late night work, travel, what not!

Whatever the hardships may be, people still fly to this country. To the land of dreams. When every flight land in this country, it carries a group of people with dreams and aspirations, who might be a son, father, brother, wife, daughter, mother. But one fact remains: whatever role they play in their life, they all are here for one goal—to work and earn money to make his or her loved ones’ dream come true. Some will fight and win; the other will lose and fly back. It is a continuous cycle.

M for Marriage

i was thinking what shld be my next topic for my blog.
Atlast i decided that shld be something interesting..
My first write up was seen by so many of my friends n was appreciated!!!!!!!!!
I am a person who's turn on is appreciation ....
One more motivational factor is that one of myfrnd restarted blogging (inspired by me)
So as transitivity rule implieS (A->B->C) So A->C
The best topic i loved for past 1 n half year is family life....
Initially the question i raised is What is the best thing u love in ur
husband N the worse thing u hate in ur husband.
Personally i asked many of my friends about this..
My god i was just wondering to see i am the only
wife who find problems with my husband...hehheheh.
All most all wive's were having a real tough time
to make out something which they hate in their husband...
Unfortunately most of friends in the male category are unmarried so that i was not able to do a survey on their turn on n offs in wife
Some of my friends asked me what all you dont like in ur husband...


So i opened my encyclopedia of complaints about husband..

1)I don't like him when he scold me.
2)I don't like him when he dont help me.
3)I don't like him when he ask me to cook.
4)I don't like him when he dont get something for me.
5)I don't like him when he arguee with me.
6)I don't like him when he dont pay attention
to my "thalayinamanthrams".
7)I don't like him when he ask me to get up early.
8)I don't like him when he watch cricket when i am talking to him.
9)I don't like him when he don't pamper me like a child.

On the whole 10) I don't like him when he make me unhappy...

Then started the commedy all most all started telling
ohh yeah we all forgot to tell all those points...
All wive's are happy when their husband allow them to be in their comfort zone.....
The best part is that all husband's knows the turn on's of their wife....
N that is matter where the 90% of the wife population act like identical kids....

A small hand in cleaning.
A small shopping.
A small dinner from outside..
A small appreciation from his side.
A word of support.
An ear for listening.
A trip to the theatre.
Do something which we forget to do.
Last but not the least a hug when we never expect,a kiss...

After reading this all guys will have a smilar question then whatz the need of a wife...
Then i have the answer for u.. to accept you n love you as your are....
From my 1 n half year of "happy married" life i came to a conclusion..
All day are giving you some new lessons.
Those who take the best part of each days succeed in their life..other's also live...
But for them success defenition will be different..
Those people are the one who say's married life is adjustment.


What u think is it an adjustment...?
Is adjustment is the measure of success in married life?
That is a question that i am leaving to u....
But for me "acceptance" is the measurement of success...
With courtesy quoting a dialogue from a film i recently watched.
Married life is like a "Noah's ark"
If we have the propotionate measure of love,fights,romance,affection,possession...every
couple can celebrate their "Oak anniversary"


But one thing i noticed in every wife is that deep inside the heart they are proudly saying
" My husband is da best...."

The start of Deja Vu

This might the first blog which i own my self...

I am person who will start everything with great josh... but in between i will loose my interest n will drop the activities which i started..When i was doing my MCA the concept of blog was introduced in our class of techies.... We all started blogging in group..Our class with a great strength of 33 in which girls dominated, was split in to groups of 4 or 5 .We were asked to do blogging on latest technologies n gadgets..Still i remember the lab in the first floor of SCMS in which we sit together in groups n discuss the names for the blog ... i think that proactive mentality was just becos of the new concept of blogging..As i already told i'm into a category which loose interest very fast(except my love for husband family n friends)...i lost interest in blogging also..to be more precise it was more like a pregnancy which was aborted in its chemical pregnancy period itself..So after a long years of 3 or 4..i gained inetrest in blogging. I just dont want to hide something is very true...that my inspirations for my blog is my friend priya which i call her chalukunju...she is a great time artist of big time "chalus",CHALUS means...unwanted commedies in wrong situations...But really her blogs are very simple n its like a deja vu.I started with commenting to the blogs of my friends. So felt like this a platform which I can spend a lil time for myself..To me blogging is "Sharing N Fun".Yeah just sharing of my good bad mad wiered ideas..Hope i can continue my blog for a lil long time b4 i loose interest :)